i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
Randomize
