I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
