I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
Randomize
