Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
