What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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