Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize
