where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
Randomize
