Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
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