well you can't waste a boner
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
