ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
