The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
Swine flu is the new snow day.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
My vagina just clenched in fear
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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