Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
Randomize
