Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
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