I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
I spent part of my valentines extracting candy hearts from a woman's vagina. The entire time I was thinking "this job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes."
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
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