Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
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