Non-Jews are for practice
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
Randomize
