I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Randomize
