Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
Randomize
