You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
Randomize
