just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
Randomize
