So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
Randomize
