Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
Randomize
