He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize