I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
Randomize