I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
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