ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
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