she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
There's always time for handjobs
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
Randomize
