Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
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