we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize
