suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
Randomize