what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize