I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Randomize
