Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
you were so drunk you tried to use the microwave as a calculator for your BAC
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Randomize
