Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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