Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
What a dumb baby whore.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
Randomize
