Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
i just realized that the oil change sticker on my windshield is a day before the last time i had sex. I've driven exactly 10500 miles since.
you need to get laid.. and an oil change.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
