Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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