How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
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