I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
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