new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
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