I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize
