i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
We had sex on a dog bed..
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Randomize
