how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
Dignity is for republicans.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Randomize
