I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
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