i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
