He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Randomize