foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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