we have officially lost it.
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
