There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
