It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Randomize
