I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
wow bdsm is so cute
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Randomize
